Suffering…and the Table

I think a lot about suffering these days, as I am sure many of us do. I read news and see article after article about conflict, war, loss, grief, anger, rage and intense pain.

And then I read articles about people standing up and showing the best of humanity. Often around food. People delivering meals to anyone isolated due to age, illness or fear of leaving their homes. I see heroes like Chef Jose Andres arriving on the scene of nearly any natural and man-made disaster you can imagine over the last years, beginning with Hurricane Maria in Puerto Rico. ( www.wck.org )

And to do what?

Feed people. Comfort people through food. Create a sense of home in a hot meal.

Now this is not a treatise into the good work that Chef Jose does, although one except the most heartless among us could find fault with his work. It’s a treatise into the power of food and the table.

Through food, we communicate; we preserve tradition; we create family. We comfort, nourish and welcome with food. Food is not the stuff of conflict (and yes, there have been wars over salt and wheat for sure, but in general…). Food usually unites us; shows us our humanity, our souls, our hearts.

We may never, I fear, discover that war solves nothing; it simply creates devastation. War is as old as humanity and remains just as cruel and stupid (in my view). To harm another creature, another human, for the gain of soil or power or money has always been a lose-lose situation.

Once the powerful or the bully has gained the upper hand over his vanquished enemy, is he happy? Is he content with his spoils, his enemy’s humiliation? Or does the bloodthirst for more power embolden him? I have no answers except to say that for me, I cannot imagine feeling a shred of satisfaction over the suffering of another being because of my actions. But that’s me.

Instead, we need to look for ways to bring people to the table. As Chef Jose says, we can always build a longer table. We can always cook more and serve more. We can vanquish our enemies with love and compassion by filling their stomachs and melting their hearts.

I know this sounds high-minded, but I am reminded of my Japanese teacher, Michio who once said, as we watched the news together, that if our representatives ate together; ate the same foods, their blood quality would become similar and they would be able to communicate better. If they ate more vegetables, they would be calmer and be more inclined to discuss peace…peacefully.

He also told the story of there being only so many ‘apples’ in the world and if someone ate more than their share of apples, others would starve. Sound familiar to you?

At the time, I thought that was a bit…woo-woo. But now, these decades later when I see the bloodthirst in the eyes of powerful people; when I see the greed and the want for more when they have so much, I know in my heart that he was right.

So what’s the answer? It begins in our kitchens, with our families, in our communities. Cooking will bring us together; eating together even more so. Can we resolve the conflicts and problems of the world at the table? I don’t know, but it’s certainly a delicious option and one that would serve us more than our current ideas of resolution through violence and destruction of countries, people and families.

Reaching out and enjoying a meal together allows us see that we are not so different after all. It allows us fall in love with the idea of communion. It reveals our humanity in all its fragility and strength.

I say we resolve to cook and eat more communally; yes, even with those with whom we disagree. Hate has gotten us nowhere. Why not see what love and good food can create?